Digging deeper...

There's been a storm of thoughts and emotions, going on inside of me for the past few years now. I've kept it mostly hidden, locked away, unable to even clarify for myself, what the meaning or message in this storm has been all about. It started as a quiet unrest, a whisper, that has grown steadily louder to almost a scream.. I've been trying to sort thru it, understand it, name it even. And even now after all this time, I still have only begun to scratch at the surface. But the tide of emotions inside me keep rising, and I don't think I can hold closed the flood gates any longer.
So if your looking for or expecting just another upbeat, inspiring, creative, juicy, life is just great, kind of blog ? Then this isn't the blog for you. If that is what your looking for, then there seems to be an almost over abundance of them going around to choose from. (And before I get some stones thrown at me.) Let me just say, I'm not saying there's anything wrong with the super upbeat, happily creating, life is grand, kinda blogs. We need them too. We all sometimes need upbeat happy blogs, filled with happy art. I have a few favorites I subscribe to myself.
But with that being said, I guess I've just been feeling a strong need to dig deeper, get realer, more raw with my art and my writing. I don't know? Maybe I need to purge all the sadness, frustrations, pain, doubts, struggles out of my system? Maybe the answer lies in finding a better balance between the upbeat and positive, and life's struggles and challenges? All I know for certain, is that I want to express thru my art and my writings what I am 'really' feeling at the time. I want to dig deep, I want to share my joys and my sorrows in my blog. I want to paint from my heart and soul. I want to express on canvas my broken heart, my fears, my pain. But also my biggest dreams, joys, and triumphs too.. I want my art journal to be less about 'pretty pages' and backgrounds with just an inspiring word like Believe on it. And more about my words, the real me, my story, my life. I want to express it all, the good and the bad. And maybe even the boring routine things that make up daily living too. I am not anywhere even near perfect, my life is far from anything even remotely perfect. In alot of ways I am broken, and so is my life. Yes I do have many talents or gifts, and my life has it's fair share of blessings too. And yes it is important to do the best one can to remain positive and optimistic. But at the same time I feel it is equally important, at least for me, to share and express those less then perfect moments or aspects of ourselves as well. To give a voice to our sorrows,our shortcomings, our pain, our frustrations, our regrets, and challenges too. I guess for me, I sometimes just can't relate to happy pretty girl art and happy blogs filled with good news, and wonderful artfilled adventures. I save those for my cheerier days..Maybe I am alone in feeling this? I don't know? I can only speak for myself. So for me, I am going to begin digging deeper, giving a voice to all aspects of myself, my life, not just the happier positive side, but all sides of life's moments and emotions. And expressing that voice in my art and my writing..And if by chance, I am not the only one feeling this way, then join in and dig deeper too..

Life without speaking...

As some of you may already know I need to go in for surgery soon. And the recovery time will be a couple of months. At first I was really bummed out to have to do this, but I've decided to look at things from a different and hopefully more positive perspective. Like most women and mom's, I have always tended towards putting myself last on the priority list. I've neglected my own needs and my health for a while now. So this will actually be a good thing. A chance to focus on my life, my health, my art, my goals, etc. And this surgery will clear up some health issues, and pain that I've been dealing with for quite some time. So instead of being bummed out, or even freaked out. I am going to use this time to heal, recover, and nurture myself. I will spend my winter snuggling in and relaxing, recovering, re-evaluating my life, and also focusing more on my art. So that when spring arrives I will be healthier, stronger, more focused and energetic. Kind of like a butterfly..I will nestle into my little cocoon, do the work I need too, and emerge with new wings and brighter color, ready to fly. I have sooo many ideas and art projects inside my head just waiting for a chance to be born, and this will be the perfect time to really focus on making them a reality. I also plan on spending my healing winter days learning to knit, take and edit video, learning to use my new sewing machine, and hopefully make some cool things..I also plan to blog a lot more, seeing as part of the recovery process restricts me from speaking at all at first and then only on a limited basis until I have healed more..which should be interesting to say the least..but again instead of freaking out about it, I've decided to use it as a means to express myself in other non-verbal ways, such as art and writing..so stay tuned for future updates on my surgery and recovery adventure and life without speaking...

INSOMNIAC RADIO..

Well folks it's here. Please tune in Saturday night, September 26th. at 11pm. est. For my first official show. My guest will be my dear artsy friend Lynda! Listen in as we talk about art, creativity, life and everything in between. Feel free to call in with questions or just to join in the fun. Also I am still in the process of booking future guest spots. So if your interested please don't be shy, contact me and we can chat about you and your wonderful artsy goodness being on a future segment. http://www.blogtalkradio.com/KelleysKorner

Great Happenings!

Well folks it's finally here. The launching of my own radio show! Yup can you imagine? Me? Let loose over the air waves! Muahahaha! I am so looking forward to doing this, and I so hope you all join in for a listen. I hope to have some special guest co-hosts on as well. It will be such fun to have a place to chat about art, creativity, life, challenges, inspirations, and everything in between. A place to connect and a place to be heard as well. I am in the process of compiling a list of future guest spots so please don't be shy, send me a message if you'd like to appear on a future episode, or call in to the show too! I want this to be for all of us!! I will be posting the official annoucement with show time and date within the next day or so, so please stay tuned for further info! And thank you all so very much for your support and friendship. It means the world to me..you are all such shinning stars! Shine On Sista's! xoxo~~~Kelley

Important update

Just wanted to say that I am sorry I haven't been posting or around much the last few weeks. My mother passed away recently, after a long illness, and it's been a difficult time for me. It is a strange and difficult road, the grieving process. The sadness, the tears, the memories that flood you, at times when you least expect it. And even moments of acceptance and peace that stir in the midst of this emotional roller coaster. I am only now slowly beginning to feel like joining the world again. And to be honest even that feeling changes from day to day, moment to moment. So I am doing the only thing I can do, and that is take it one day, one hour at a time. To allow myself to grieve, to remember, to cry and to miss so deeply the woman I was so blessed to call my mother.
I am beginning to work on some art projects that express how I feel and to also honor her memory. I am hoping to figure out and organize in the near future an art auction to benefit Alzhiemer's research, as this disease steals precious time and memories from so many loved ones. If anyone has any information on how to go about setting up an online art auction for a charity. I would greatly appreciate any help or information you could offer, as I've never done anything like this before. It would mean alot to me to honor her memory in this way and to also help with finding a cure so that other's may be spared from the effects of such a devasting disease. Thank you...

Wreck This Journal!!

Well I just signed up for wreck this journal at


http://tnc-wreckthisjournal.blogspot.com/

this is going to be loads of fun, and a bit scary at times too. Imagine wreaking a journal, defacing a book, destroying it! It is sure going to be an adventure. I hope you will all go and sign up too! Already there are I'd guess over a hundred folks doing the project too.. Well I ran out to Barnes and Noble tonight and bought my Wreck This Journal book by Keri Smith. It was only 12.95 too. And I am sure I may have found it online for even cheaper but I didn't want to wait for the mailman to deliver it. I wanted to get started as soon as possible. But sadly it is now very late and so I am going to start my first assignments tomorrow morning. I will be posting a blog each week on my progress, complete with photos, and maybe even some videos too! I hope you go sign up and join in the fun too. Stay tuned for more updates..

A great giveaway!!

hey ladies there is a fantastic giveaway up for grabs..check out this awesome blog and while your there don't forget to sign up for the great bird lover's giveaway too!!
http://waysidetreasures-sandi.blogspot.com/2009/06/giveawaycalling-all-bird-lovers.html

Best of Luck to all who enter!! Kelley